It's a warm welcome to Thailand

We landed at Suvarnabhumi (That's Bangkok Airport to you and me) half an hour early thanks to a tail wind of over 100mph for most of the journey. At over 30 degrees celcius at 9am we had definitely waved goodbye to cold, damp and miserable Britain - now it was time to relax.

24 hours earlier we had been relaxing of a different sort in the Holiday Inn at Heathrow, well chuffed at England's victory over the Paddies at rugby. Not too chuffed though with the prices in that place.

We didn't get too much change out of £150 for two bottles of wine, two glasses of wine and two mediocre meals - come on chain hoteliers of Britain - even Dick Turpin wore a mask!

Undeterred though and not wanting to make an issue over costs we made our way to the shiny new Terminal 5 via the Hopper Bus. BA have the complete monopoly over this block of real estate, so much, you can print out boarding cards before the bag drop from even shinier machines. Amazingly security was a breeze, I didn't even have to strip down to my undies to prove I wasn't a terrorist - just the belt came off this time.

Pre-booking the Aspire lounge proved to be the jewel in the crown as hapless travellers were turned away at the reception. All hoping to get in on the hop and all failing significantly. The real brownie points for me came with the bottle of bubbly I pre-ordered; where would we be without the internet?

BA fly big planes and little planes. To get to the big plane we were flying out on and parked across the apron, it was down the escalators to the underground transit system - all working smoothly! Do you know what? I could really get used to this travelling around the world malarkey - I wonder if I could persuade anyone to pay me to do it?

Needless to say, I didn't turn left when I boarded BA0009 and we dutifully turned right into cattle class which, with typical BA aplomb, they've called "World Traveller". Give them their due though, it was comfortable enough, there was a great choice of movies and the food was palatable. I suppose when you are bogging off for three months and in no rush, you could be strapped to the wings: as long as the price is right!

So, we've landed! Last time here we were met by our brother-in-law and chauffeur-driven to my sisters palatial gaff. This time she set us a challenge ( sort of dungeons and dragons on steroids), a message pinged onto my Facebook instructing us to hop in a taxi - we would be met at her place!

Not to be outdone by my devious sibling I set off at great pace to find the taxis, armed only with her address, written in English.

At this point I was halted immediately by the shrieking of the wife - I'd left her well behind. I made a mental note not to do this again on our travels - next time she may just let me run off into the great blue yonder. As it worked out there is a foolproof way of getting a cab at the airport which involves marshals giving you a ticket with a number on. That number corresponds to the taxi line. See, just like the deli counter at most supermarkets.

It was a half hour drive to Mandy's luxury 27th floor pad at the Chatrium Residences and we were soon feeling the stifling heat. They say in the tropics, "tea is good for cooling you down". Stuff that - I say, as a couple of ice cold Chang Classics were cracked open for us on arrival - well, our body clocks told us it was still the middle of the night, not breakfast - cheers!

Well, it's got to be done!

The view from my sisters apartment. A bit

Hazy but hot - damned hot!

The First Steps

Every journey starts with the first step; so some very wise person once said - probably! After we spent a few days saying our goodbyes to family and friends in Morecambe, we finally took ours - to Warminster.

Thursday 25th Feb was our first step, onto a Virgin train en-route to Birmingham New Street and a very smooth journey it was too: until we got there.

The mysteries of the train company franchises and re-routing has thrown up a massive headache for those of us wanting to travel from the north west to the south west. We now have to get off a perfectly serviceable train which could easily have made it to the West Country and wait for another one which has come from Newcastle.

Changing at Birmingham before was bad enough but with the refurb it's even worse. It didn't help the fact the memsahib needed the loo, however when she emerged onto the shiny new concourse with about seven minutes to spare before our connection to Bristol we started to panic.

I could see where we needed to be but we were in the wrong zone! Negotiating the automatic ticket barriers with two backpacks a suitcase and a wife isn't easy at all. Even worse; in order to get to platform 9B we had to once again fight with another set of barriers. On the other side the monitor at platform 9 read Newcastle - where was 9B?

Thankfully Virgin and Network Rail have realised that navigating their shiny new station is like trying to do the puzzle on the Krypton Factor, badly, and have positioned many advisors around the choke points. We did, thankfully, make our Cross Country train and the journey to Bristol was uneventful.

You change at Temple Meads ( A cold fridge of a station) for Warminster. We headed for the pasty franchise in the underpass to warm us both up, waiting for the Portsmouth Harbour train. Don't think we'll see a pasty for a while whilst in Asia?

On arrival in Bath the train filled with lots of very posh kids, probably with very rich parents who could afford to send them to very expensive schools. (And afford the season ticket for the train). Not a swear word uttered though - they were all too busy on their iPhones.

At last we pulled into Warminster, the place I attended army courses, fell in love, got married and eventually lived for over ten years. A chance to say farewell to Lynn's family and not too far from Heathrow - phase 1 completed!

The last supper at Quite Simply French in Lancaster

Daylight robbery!!

On our way.

The Seven P's!!

We had a saying in the army, Prior Planning and Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance - there, seven of them!

To undertake a trip like ours we had to do something more inventive than scribbling our itinerary down on the back of a fag packet. In fact, we still haven't put pen to paper but have certainly planned the backside out of it.

The other issue raising its ugly head was funding, especially as we were giving up our jobs. First thing we needed was a reference point to begin calculating costs - a trip to Waterstones and the purchase of a couple of Lonely Planet guides did the trick. That and the obligatory Internet search.

We also bought a large map of the area we planned to visit. Opening that out on the tables in the front room of the York Hotel showed us the enormity of both the area we'd be travelling and our expectations. 

So, the embryonic plan was to arrive in Bangkok, touching base with my sister and celebrate her birthday on 4th March.

We would then head north towards Chang Mai getting close to the border with Laos. The next stage involves taking a boat along the Meekong River to the Lao city of Luang Prabang. From there we have our first real challenge - how to get to Hanoi?

 In the event we do make it to the capital of Vietnam a visit to Halong Bay has got to be on the cards. From there the plan is to travel by rail and stop off at Danang, Hoi An, Nha Trang (Vietnam's  most famous seaside town) and Ho Chi Min City - Saigon to us oldies!

It could well be another train journey to Cambodia and Phnom Penh, followed by a must see trip to Angkor Wat before heading back into Thailand to wash our undies and socks at my sisters - I'm sure she won't mind!

Another train journey will see us heading towards Singapore. We plan a stop-off at the Royal Resort of Hua Hin where we'll meet up with an old army pal before continuing on towards Penang and Kuala Lumpur. Singapore will be an emotion filled visit as I'm paying homage to my great uncle Bernard who was captured by the Japanese there. The troop ship he was travelling on was torpedoed. 

Bali is the next port of call where we are planning on meeting up with an old work colleague from my days with Orange. He lives in Perth so the next plan is to head off there with him and stop at his house. We probably wouldn't get another chance to do this in our lives so what the hell - let's go for it!

However plans wax and wane on the journey there is one definite, we have to be in Bangkok before15th May - our flight is booked to come back that day.

Having been in the forces I do realise some plans go "tits up" in the execution, many ill fated Battalion operations and excercises are testament to that. Still, you have to start somewhere and our plan and timeline gives us 80 days to cram in all those locations. But, who knows - maybe events will push us in different directions here and there - we are in no rush to actually get anywhere, especially as we've worked the finances out. We can backpack on a pension!

Let's go on an adventure!

I suppose there comes a time, when reaching a certain age, you decide to throw caution to the wind, stuff conventiality and go off and do something far out and radical.
Ok, for some that could involve nothing more exciting than a caravan holiday in Cornwall or a trip to Blackpool lights. Nothing wrong with either of those activities. I know many people who like nothing better than being holed up inside a tin box on wheels in a force ten gale or sitting in stationary traffic for an hour on the Golden Mile. Each to their own.
No, the activity I'm embarking on is going to take me and the wife (she would qualify that with "long suffering") a little further afield than the south west. In fact further than the south west of Europe. We're doing a Grancation - in SE Asia!

Now you may think at our age we should know better than undertake a hairbrained scheme at our time of life. "You're both too old to be spending time in the tropics, surely you could go for a fortnight to Benidorm - isn't that what all the oldies do?" 

Well, in time we will be living in Spain  (not Benidorm - heaven forbid) but for now our sights are firmly focused on the Far East and what should be the journey of a lifetime. And basically - why not?

Having been to Thailand a couple of years ago we were virtually spoiled as we gratefully accepted the hospitality of my sister who is based in Bankok. We marvelled at the pictorial evidence of her families travels around the region. Hey, why be posted in an exotic area then not see any of it. They have done it all and bought the T shirt. Their experiences sowed the seed in our minds to do it ourselves one day. That day has now come.